platinum 51: unpacking

Trophies: 26 (6 gold 9 silver 10 bronze)
Time to platinum: 5 hours
Platinum name: All Moved In
Achievement rate: 13.8%

2023 has been a disappointingly slow year for platinums, I must admit. After dragging my heels for months with Stray and A Plague Tale: Requiem (to the point that I eventually realized Stray had been removed from PS Plus and I no longer even have access to the game), I shifted focus to Immortals Fenyx Rising… and while the game itself is hugely enjoyable, the grind is admittedly starting to test my sanity (other recent titles, such as Hogwarts Legacy and Jedi Survivor, caused me to tap out on the platinum chase almost immediately).

Thankfully, Unpacking - a title I’d been relatively curious to check out - arrived on PS Plus last month and, as an added bonus, it’s a quick and easy plat. I absolutely adored Witch Beam’s first game, Assault Android Cactus - a turbocharged twin-stick shooter with a cast of adorable pixie androids - but this feels like a step backwards, at least in terms of ambition… one of those “conceptual” pitches that’s light on gameplay but heavy on the pseudo-profundity.

Basically, you move into eight different homes (or “levels”) between 1997 and 2018, where you’re tasked with transferring your worldly possessions from cardboard boxes to shelves, closets, and cabinets. The basic idea is that the simple art of “unpacking” provides a surprising degree of insight into the trajectory of the unnamed female protagonist’s life. Which actually is a rather intriguing concept for a video game. Unfortunately, her life proves almost as boring-ass as mine… she moves into her college dorm, moves into her first apartment, moves in with her boyfriend, moves back home after they break up, etc… etc… it’s not like she’s arriving in Copenhagen to start an astrophysics fellowship.

Many have praised the game for being relaxing and low-stress, given its leisurely rhythm and soothing soundtrack… but, if anything, it just wreaked havoc with my OCD. Most of the time I had to take everything out of the boxes in a given room and scatter it all over the floor first… putting the belongings away one-by-one - without knowing what was coming next - put me on edge to a surprising degree. How can I fold this t-shirt and place it on a shelf when I don’t know how many *other* items of clothing will be forthcoming, or how carefully I’ll need to partition space in the closet?? It doesn’t help that the retro pixel art graphics, while charming in style, often make it difficult to tell what you’re even looking at - I spent a long time assuming a certain device was some sort of rice cooker, until I eventually realized it was a video game console (there are still some random nicknacks I never did figure out - when in doubt, just shove it all under the bed. along with that f#$%ing ukulele our hero never seems to get rid of).  

The actual platinum is incredibly simple… all you have to do is complete the eight levels and a handful of random tasks. “Brilliantly Solved” requires you to form an equation out of refrigerator magnets (1 + 2 = 3 will do the trick… no need to invoke advanced calculus). “Solve a Puzzle” is earned by solving the Rubik’s Cube in your childhood bedroom (and by “solve” I mean you just click on it three or four times). “Electrical Hazard” is earned by placing your toaster in the tub (or alternatively your flat iron in the bathroom sink), while "A Sometimes Food" can be yours if you simply place the cookie jar on the highest shelf. “Baby Builder” requires you to form a tower by stacking a handful of baby blocks (whoops, spoiler - you feel blindsided, I'm sure), while "Fuzzy Friends" tasks you with placing the stuffed pig and stuffed tiger side-by-side. Remembering to flush every toilet in the game (pro tip: there’s two bathrooms on the final level) is about as strenuous as it gets. Well, it's not exactly playing Wolfenstein 2: The New Colossus on "Mein Leben" difficulty. A platinum’s a platinum, but I’d rate my sense of accomplishment around a 0.5 for this one.